TOKD 1 - 1 Duggers

Guest report from TokD's answer to Adam Johnson, Tom 'Garrido' Goulding:

A Team of Kevin Doyles arrived in SW13 for their second game of the League of Gentlemen Championship campaign against (The) Duggers. Aiming to maintain his 100% record having beaten Farmville 4-1, Manager Dave Ivermee started with the same 4-2-3-1 formation (a de facto disguised 4-4-1-1). With Miskimmin banished to Belfast, Tom Crowley played off trequartista Ivermee. T.C. Chau hustled in midfield around team-mate Mark Stewart. There were several débutantes, namely the fraternal Nick Corbett, the cultured Luke Robbins, the spritely Adam Carey, and Michael Trousers in goal.

"Corbett’s ball!” BAM.
Chances for ToKD were few and far between – while Pete Corbett’s forehead eat up every aimless long ball and long throw Duggers could muster. Duggers harried, Duggers hastled. The game’s level of entropy rocketed. The ball ricocheted off knees and shin pads. Conditions were not favourable to ToKD’s expansive style. A long period of uncertainty and stalemate, until Duggers’ Jon Parkin got behind the oranje defence to lob Trousers and astonishly, put Duggers ahead 1-0. Half-time, and a desperate need for Barker’s safety oranges and Goulding’s Isotonic Sports Drinks.

“Corbett’s ball!” BOSH.
Second half and 4-3-3. Danby’s energy and drive pushed ToKD on, and Carey fired over from close range. Trousers was untroubled in the ToKD goal; it was one-way traffic. The intensity of the rain increased with ToKD’s frustration. Robbins had a credible penalty shout turned down. The rain was forceful and horizontal. It was a true wet and windy Tuesday night at the Reebok, and you feel that if ToKD weren’t a brave symphony of English passion, they wouldn’t have survived. As it was, the spectators were treated to a dénouement of international proportions.

“Corbett’s ball!” THUD.
The clock ticked down. Hearts were beating; studs were flying, as the oranje soldiers fought for every ball. 94th minute, into the box – Trowbrige’s shin, Corbett’s knee, Barker! Slotting into the bottom corner, Barker wheeled away. Cue belly slide, pandemonium, and all-round relief. The referee’s whistle went as Duggers kicked off.

As the mud settled on a hard-fought draw, ToKD mused; 1 point gained or 2 points lost? There was undoubtedly an overriding frustration at not having beaten the Duggers outfit, which is natural for a team of this ability. But in those conditions, there was character and resolve.

Still unbeaten – onwards and upwards.

Team: Trousers, Whiting, P. Corbett (Kevin Prince-Boateng Man of the Match), McConvey (c), Barker, N. Corbett, Stewart, Chau, Goulding, Crowley, Ivermee, Danby, Robbins, Carey, Trowbridge, Elphick.

PBI 1

Inaugural Pitt-Brooke Index scores from the 4-1 win over Farmville:

Mann 3 (2+1)

Barker 5 (2+3)

McConvey 2
Elphick 2

Trowbridge 2

Stewart 8 (2+5+1)

Danby 2

Crowley 2

Ivermee 16 (2+6+6+2)

Goulding 10 (2+5+3)

Miskimmin 8 (2+3+3)

Corbett 1

TC Chau 1

Whiting 1

Pitt-Brooke 1

TOKD 4 - 1 Farmville

There's nothing quite like the thrill of opening day; the epic possibilites of an empty book. And today Team of Kevin Doyles wrote the first chapter in their 2010/11 epic with a storming 4-1 win over Farmville.

Manager Dave Ivermee decided to go with a 4-2-3-1 system, built around the all-DUAFC doble pivote of Steve 'Sergio Busquets' Danby and Mark 'Xabi Alonso' Stewart. The midfield triangle was tipped by Ivermee, in his preferred enganche role. This allowed ToKD to pass through what was a fairly agricultural opposition. With Toms Goulding and Crowley cutting in from wide, and Matt Miskimmin doing his best Ivica Olić impression up front chances were always going to flow.

Miskimmin had two good early opportunities. The first came as he received the ball with his back to goal, and spun the defender with vicious grace. Think Dennis Bergkmap against Newcastle, think Felipe Caicedo against Aalborg. Unfortunately his shot was palmed over the bar. Minutes later he slid in from close range but failed to get his foot round the ball. But as Emile Heskey taught us there is nothing more vulgar than assessing a striker merely by the goals he scored, and it was Miskimmin who set up ToKD's first, with a near post header that was bundled in by Tom Goulding.

The second came soon after, a direct free-kick from Ivermee after a hand ball on the edge of the box. Hard, straight, right footed and into the far corner, it instantly reminded everyone watching of Elano's famous free-kick against Newcastle United. Two goals was a good early lead against what were fairly agricultural opposition, but it was halved just before the break after a penalty was cruelly awarded against Jon Elphick for a tackle that was only seconds late. Still, 2-1 was a deserved lead.

After half time, ToKD reimposed their will on the game, not allowing their tempo to be disrupted by a raft of substitutions. The third goal came when Dave Ivermee fired in another shot from distance, before Mark Stewart finished off a good team move with a satisfying slam high into the net. Farmville had little spirit for the fight after this, and ToKD closed out a comfortable opening win.

Where we're heading #2

At Team of Kevin Doyles we love tekkers. And we love titles. But what we really love is title-winning tekkers. Can you bring out your best game when it matters most? This is why I love this goal from Joe Cole so much. Unbelievably good feet to burst through three or defenders, and a good finish to win their second consecutive EPL title in 2005/06.

Where we're heading #1

As Technical Director I have a duty to ensure that Team of Kevin Doyles play 'a decent brand' of football. As such I will use the blog to showcase the sort of the stuff I expect from the team. If we want to write our name in the sky, we have to start by reaching for the stars. This is what we can achieve. This is where we're heading.

Welcome

Hello and welcome to To Wexford and Beyond - the web's leading 'Team of Kevin Doyles' blog.

I will report and discuss the progress of the team, grab EXCLUSIVE CHATS with the STAR STRIKERS and put up YouTube clips that other people post elsewhere on the internet amuse me.

It will also be the place for the running points tallies of the ToKD fantasy points game. Points will be allocated on the same basis as for the Fantasy.PremierLeague.com: 2 points for playing, 3 for an assist etc etc. I will count up the scores and present some award at the end of the season.

Stay tuned!

Jack Pitt-Brooke

ToKD Technical Director